Donnerstag, 10. Juni 2010

Uninspiration

Don't look at me like that. Your puppy eyes don't impress me. You're no inspiration today, for sure. I wonder why I ever thought you might help me become famous. I must have been mad to believe what they said about you folks!

Nothing happened. No streak of genius. My words are flat, uninspired. Dead. What kind of a writer *am* I? Staring at the screen for hours. I tried pen and paper, as you suggested, but - nada. Niente. Do I have to spell it out for you? Useless piece of flesh that you are. I wonder if I could trade you in for a parrot.

Repeat, please? Yes, yes, I know - you *tried*. Let me tell you something, you didn't try hard enough! You're such a lazy ass! Stop whining and come up with something! That's the only thing you know, hu? Please this, please that, I want... - you don't want anything, unless I permit it. And right now, all I want to hear from you is brilliance. You have five minutes to come up with something. I'll go make some coffee. Thank God I don't need you for that. Maybe I should put you in the machine, see if some hot caffeine does you any good.

What did you say? Unchain you? Stupid, I'll never let you go. If nothing else, at least you make for a nice decoration when I have friends over. And don't forget to sparkle. Or have you forgotten how to do that as well?

Pah. Muses are overrated.

Kommentare:

slommler hat gesagt…

Ha! Now that is a way to tame a Muse!!!
Hugs
SueAnn

Tomara Armstrong hat gesagt…

hehehe. I wish my Muse sparkled.

Fun post
~2

John Wiswell hat gesagt…

That's not a muse. It's a troll doll. I told you they didn't sell magical inspiration at petrol station check-outs.

Rayna M. Iyer hat gesagt…

That they are- overrated, that is!

pegjet hat gesagt…

That's what my mom would call a conversation piece. Did you try caffeinating the muse?

Fun read.

Sulci Collective hat gesagt…

making tea & coffee, that's about all muses are good for. Nice.

marc nash

5amthinking hat gesagt…

Sure you weren't inspired? You drew me in, made me say "What is she talking about?" and kept me reading to the very end. At first I thought you were talking about a real person that you occasionally mention in tweets. By the way, the problem with muses is that they inspire us while we're thinking about other things.

Emma Newman hat gesagt…

Ahhh, this I can relate to :) Very cute. x

Diandra hat gesagt…

Thanks for all your lovely comments!

And for the records - if I ever tried to chain my muse, she'd kick my sorry ass through Hades, north to south and back. Maybe even in circles. (^v^)

PJ hat gesagt…

Such a sorry excuse for a muse ;-) Guess you'll have to trade her in on a turbo model ;-)

Eric J. Krause hat gesagt…

The problem with muses is that the second you're ready to give up on them entirely they give you a great idea. Then they give you nothing until the next time you're about to throw them out...

Good story!